Giving Up on Love

Well, not really on love but on my crush.

I only saw him last Monday, and for the past three days, I have not seen him. I resolved to ask his name the next time but I guess we are not fated to get to know each other.

I will just accept the fact that I can only admire him from a far... it's more exciting not knowing his name, there will always be the mystery.

I think that's me.

If I get to know his name, the excitement will be gone.

Just like in sex. I am more excited in the anticipation of getting laid, but once I am in the act of doing it, I am not really satisfied and would want to get it over and done with.

The same with my obsession with cell phones. I blogged that I am obsessed with Nokia E51 but after a month, I sold it coz I am not happy once I had it. The same with Nokia N70. When I can't afford expensive cellphones in the past, I pine for it. When I finally bought N70 (which is quite pricey in 2006), I am not satisfied. Now, I'm back with a much simpler phone, My Phone T22 because it's dual sim. It serves me well, but after having it for a week, I want a new one. Oh well.

Just like with work. Technically, I have no problem with my job. Imagine, I am a legitimate marketing communication manager. Legitimate in the sense that before, I can choose my title as we are not that formal in my previous work. When I was being poached and recruited, I prayed to get the job and the salary I asked for. I did.

I am thankful for the job as it pays for my credit card loans. But again, I am dissatisfied.

Maybe it is my nature. I can never settle.

So what to do?

I will be turning 32 come October 4, I'm still loss.