While doing my usual morning walk (can't say jog nor run coz I really just walk, and it's not really brisk walking as required, but hey, walking for an hour gets my heart beat pumping and sweat!), I got to think about my relationships...
Ddy and I have been in a relationship for the past five months, and while we have our ups and downs, lately, it's mostly downs.
We had a fight last night (June 11), over something as petty as whether we are going to see each other or not.
I will not justify our disagreement, but one thing I realized, shouldn't relationships be effortless????
Monday, June 13, 2011
Monday, May 09, 2011
It's Day 9
So far so good, and nothing to brag or shout about...
I started taking my morning walk last May 1 with the end objective of not really losing weight but gaining health.
My doctor and partner encourages me to be healthy... and not for the sake of the relationship, but for my sake, I will...
So let's take stock... since Day 1, I have been walking from 6AM to 7AM, sometimes later but not later than 7:30AM because by that time, it's hot already to walk, it's summer! I walk three times around the subdivision for 45 minutes, taking me 15 minutes to complete one round.
These walks have been doing me good. I get to think, think, think, dream, dream, dream while inhaling and exhaling the cool morning air.
This morning is slightly different, it was drizzling. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to sweat (and I didn't no matter what I do, run, brisk walk or jog, it was just too cold to sweat). The drizzling rain is invigorating...
I am not expecting to miraculously lose weight, it's enough for me that I get to, one step at a time, change my lifestyle healthily.
I started taking my morning walk last May 1 with the end objective of not really losing weight but gaining health.
My doctor and partner encourages me to be healthy... and not for the sake of the relationship, but for my sake, I will...
So let's take stock... since Day 1, I have been walking from 6AM to 7AM, sometimes later but not later than 7:30AM because by that time, it's hot already to walk, it's summer! I walk three times around the subdivision for 45 minutes, taking me 15 minutes to complete one round.
These walks have been doing me good. I get to think, think, think, dream, dream, dream while inhaling and exhaling the cool morning air.
This morning is slightly different, it was drizzling. I was afraid I wouldn't be able to sweat (and I didn't no matter what I do, run, brisk walk or jog, it was just too cold to sweat). The drizzling rain is invigorating...
I am not expecting to miraculously lose weight, it's enough for me that I get to, one step at a time, change my lifestyle healthily.
Friday, April 15, 2011
Thursday, March 31, 2011
Choices
I don't envy people who have to make difficult decisions.
And I wouldn't blame anybody for the choices they have made in their lives... we each have to live with the consequences of our choices.
Tough luck. Life is not fair, it isn't really fair. The world is not handed down to us in a silver platter.
We see our problems in different light, but because problems are personal, we see it "big" when others have no concern about it.
To each his own, and we live our life however we choose it.
And I wouldn't blame anybody for the choices they have made in their lives... we each have to live with the consequences of our choices.
Tough luck. Life is not fair, it isn't really fair. The world is not handed down to us in a silver platter.
We see our problems in different light, but because problems are personal, we see it "big" when others have no concern about it.
To each his own, and we live our life however we choose it.
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Thoughts to ponder
Oftentimes, we often get caught up with our own problems, struggles and issues that we become self-centered. It is all about me, me, me. We create a bubble of self-importance and we wallow in self-pity. Such that when our bubble bursts and we realized there is a bigger picture, we can't handle it.
I admit, I have created my own bubble, my own world and when everything come crashing down, I am left bewildered, confused and ignorant.
It's easy to put blame - I blame myself, blame my life, blame everyone and everything that is in and out of my bubble, but what's the point?
It has always been my motto not to regret the things I did or did not do, why lose energy over regrets, will it change the past? No. Nothing and no one can ever change the past and however how painful or hurtful or disappointing the past is, that's it, it's all in the past.
Clinging on the past may be therapy but would these baggage of past actions, decisions do any good now?
I am also a believer that every decision, no matter how "wrong" it seemed is not entirely "wrong". We interpret things based on our experiences. My reaction to certain things is different from anybody else reaction.
I love this word "unique" ha ha, it gives an excuse that I am different from anybody else and what I say or do is all my own because I am unique.
I would want to believe that life has a purpose, that everything happens for a reason.
It might seem that life has treated us like a leaf blown by the wind, drifting or a twig following the tide, but in the end, there will always be a destination.
In my 34 years in life (discounting the first 10 years because I doubt if I had made much impact as a toddler), I believe that I have achieved the goals I have set in my life.
I graduated valedictorian in grade school, with honor in high school, cum laude in college.
I got to be a copywriter, a publicist, a managing editor, a writer with published articles and stories.
I have been to different places I have never been to. I have set-up my own business, work for one of the biggest companies. I have been a teacher.
At this juncture, I am asking myself, what is the next adventure?
That is the question I am pondering right now...
I admit, I have created my own bubble, my own world and when everything come crashing down, I am left bewildered, confused and ignorant.
It's easy to put blame - I blame myself, blame my life, blame everyone and everything that is in and out of my bubble, but what's the point?
It has always been my motto not to regret the things I did or did not do, why lose energy over regrets, will it change the past? No. Nothing and no one can ever change the past and however how painful or hurtful or disappointing the past is, that's it, it's all in the past.
Clinging on the past may be therapy but would these baggage of past actions, decisions do any good now?
I am also a believer that every decision, no matter how "wrong" it seemed is not entirely "wrong". We interpret things based on our experiences. My reaction to certain things is different from anybody else reaction.
I love this word "unique" ha ha, it gives an excuse that I am different from anybody else and what I say or do is all my own because I am unique.
I would want to believe that life has a purpose, that everything happens for a reason.
It might seem that life has treated us like a leaf blown by the wind, drifting or a twig following the tide, but in the end, there will always be a destination.
In my 34 years in life (discounting the first 10 years because I doubt if I had made much impact as a toddler), I believe that I have achieved the goals I have set in my life.
I graduated valedictorian in grade school, with honor in high school, cum laude in college.
I got to be a copywriter, a publicist, a managing editor, a writer with published articles and stories.
I have been to different places I have never been to. I have set-up my own business, work for one of the biggest companies. I have been a teacher.
At this juncture, I am asking myself, what is the next adventure?
That is the question I am pondering right now...
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Anger Managenent
Facebook has been my outlet whenever I am angry, hurt, depressed etc. This is also where I share my joy, happiness. In fact, you can read me well if you read my FB.
This morning, I was so mad about someone that I expressed my pent-up anger in FB. Now the question is, did my posting do me any good?
While I have the option to remove my post, I choose not to.
At FB, I have been nice, sweet, romantic, excitable, all of those sugary good things but since I was diagnosed with diabetis, it's as if I lost all the sweetness in me.
So, yes I was mad this morning but not anymore.
Ddy has been very good to me. I thank God that Ddy has been there...
This morning, I was so mad about someone that I expressed my pent-up anger in FB. Now the question is, did my posting do me any good?
While I have the option to remove my post, I choose not to.
At FB, I have been nice, sweet, romantic, excitable, all of those sugary good things but since I was diagnosed with diabetis, it's as if I lost all the sweetness in me.
So, yes I was mad this morning but not anymore.
Ddy has been very good to me. I thank God that Ddy has been there...
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Betrayal of Trust
I could just imagine how painful it is to be betrayed. Since I'm the one who betrayed the trust of my Ddy, the Betrayer, I feel the pain of hurting the one person I truly loved.
Wednesday, February 16, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Fight
Because I was so worried, I expressed it in anger. So sorry. But I made up for it naman di ba?
Tuesday, February 08, 2011
Change
I have always been an advocate of change, but when change came into my life, I realized that I can't handle it. Emotionally, I cannot prepare myself to face it.
What hurts me most is that when you realized who really are the people that you can trust and who is just there using you.
I am happy that in this period of change, Ddy is there. Although he will be the first one who will be affected by my decisions, I know he will respect and accept my decisions.
What hurts me most is that when you realized who really are the people that you can trust and who is just there using you.
I am happy that in this period of change, Ddy is there. Although he will be the first one who will be affected by my decisions, I know he will respect and accept my decisions.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Si Ddy at si Bby
Well, the title implies the terms of endearment between doc and me. Ddy (that's Daddy or Dy for short) is Doc and Bby (baby or by) is me. Cheesy? ha ha ha.
I'm just glad that when Christmas came, we are already "on".
I'm just glad that when Christmas came, we are already "on".
Friday, December 31, 2010
Thank you 2010
The year 2010 has seen its shares of drama in my life, but nevertheless, I have lots to be thankful for. Unlike 2009 with its Ondoy, 2010 has no major major one event that can capsulize it. But still, I feel more blessed and happy this year.
2010 saw me appointed as Student Affairs Officer at the Philippine College of Criminology - a regular job after years of events, consultancy and here I go again, a full time employment. It's been a blessing because through this, I was able to be debt free (almost, not quite as I've found out just last week, oh well, that doesn't count because as far as I know I have been a conscientious subscriber of Digitel - hayz, their records show that I still owe them after 6 years - duh - di ko tuloy nakuha yung Corbu ko!)
2010 also saw my rekindled love life - hayz. Doc or Ddy is so in love with me I really don't know why.
Last night we had dinner and spent a pre-New Year's Eve mega bonding. We were supposed to go nightswimming but it rained so we just spent the night cuddling and talking and bonding.
He is everything I could ask for - maaalahanin, mabait, generous, mapagmahal, malambing pero seloso at moody. Well, he can't be perfect kasi may mga pagkukulang din naman ako kaya ok lang.
I think 2011 will be a wonderful challenge for both of uis lalo na he's coming back to residency in a government hospital.
I think I have matured this year. Maybe because it's my responsibilities at work, maybe because I grow up.
Whatever it is, thank you 2010.
2010 saw me appointed as Student Affairs Officer at the Philippine College of Criminology - a regular job after years of events, consultancy and here I go again, a full time employment. It's been a blessing because through this, I was able to be debt free (almost, not quite as I've found out just last week, oh well, that doesn't count because as far as I know I have been a conscientious subscriber of Digitel - hayz, their records show that I still owe them after 6 years - duh - di ko tuloy nakuha yung Corbu ko!)
2010 also saw my rekindled love life - hayz. Doc or Ddy is so in love with me I really don't know why.
Last night we had dinner and spent a pre-New Year's Eve mega bonding. We were supposed to go nightswimming but it rained so we just spent the night cuddling and talking and bonding.
He is everything I could ask for - maaalahanin, mabait, generous, mapagmahal, malambing pero seloso at moody. Well, he can't be perfect kasi may mga pagkukulang din naman ako kaya ok lang.
I think 2011 will be a wonderful challenge for both of uis lalo na he's coming back to residency in a government hospital.
I think I have matured this year. Maybe because it's my responsibilities at work, maybe because I grow up.
Whatever it is, thank you 2010.
Tuesday, December 07, 2010
No FB 'til Christmas, Duplicity and All that Stuff
I hope this blogpost gets posted on my FB account, nevertheless, I'll still write this...
I have been neglecting my blog since November. Probably because I was so busy with work, my family and my new partner in life.
Geez, Doc has been so kind. Of course we have our ups and downs, twice we already had a fight but of course we made up.
There has been so many changes and challenges at work.
Change is good. Change is for the better. However, not all is receptive to change especially if they don't understand or intentionally don't want to understand.
Each individual has his or her own personality. Some can be open minded to change, others are narrow-minded and resist change, while others are two-faced.
Let's talk about Duplicity.
A friend in the office told me that I should never show I'm affected. I cannot not show. My sense of social responsibility is so high, it disappoints and hurts me when things go bad. Heck, I was born under the sigh of Libra, ruled by the planet Venus, the Roman goddess of beauty and love. I am most happy if there is harmony everywhere and it gives me a heavy heart if there is not.
But I want to talk about duplicity.
Like I said before, I am just a mirror. I just show you or treat you the way you wanted to be treated. But overall, I am overall nice. I do not make "taray" or "suplado" and I believe I am as supportive as I can be to the point that I blindly give my support.
My bad.
Not everyone who smiles or show they are nice to me are indeed nice. Not all that say's "hi" are sincere.
I am human. That hurts me.
I am as approachable as you can get but this, me being nice and kind is being abused.
So let's talk about karma. As good as I believe I am, I do not wish bad karma to happen to people who abuse my kindness. That's how kind I am ha ha.
Recently, I am quite surprised and amazed with the rumors flying around. I am not used to being the center of gossip. Golly, why me?
I try to be as low-key as possible.
To avoid these nasty gossips, ASK ME. I will tell you the real deal.
He he he, I am rambling but I hope I got to touch the issues plaguing me and got it off my chest.
Hmmmm, last song syndrome from a K-Pop song "I don't care...e e e e" or something like that.
I DON'T CARE ha ha ha... I really find it funny, these speculations. Speculate all you want, those are just speculations ha ha ha.
Oooooooh, it's 17 (or 16) days before Christmas....
I go out of the house to go to school at 5AM. The air is cold. The sky is still twinkling with stars. Sarap matulog!!!!!
I have been neglecting my blog since November. Probably because I was so busy with work, my family and my new partner in life.
Geez, Doc has been so kind. Of course we have our ups and downs, twice we already had a fight but of course we made up.
There has been so many changes and challenges at work.
Change is good. Change is for the better. However, not all is receptive to change especially if they don't understand or intentionally don't want to understand.
Each individual has his or her own personality. Some can be open minded to change, others are narrow-minded and resist change, while others are two-faced.
Let's talk about Duplicity.
A friend in the office told me that I should never show I'm affected. I cannot not show. My sense of social responsibility is so high, it disappoints and hurts me when things go bad. Heck, I was born under the sigh of Libra, ruled by the planet Venus, the Roman goddess of beauty and love. I am most happy if there is harmony everywhere and it gives me a heavy heart if there is not.
But I want to talk about duplicity.
Like I said before, I am just a mirror. I just show you or treat you the way you wanted to be treated. But overall, I am overall nice. I do not make "taray" or "suplado" and I believe I am as supportive as I can be to the point that I blindly give my support.
My bad.
Not everyone who smiles or show they are nice to me are indeed nice. Not all that say's "hi" are sincere.
I am human. That hurts me.
I am as approachable as you can get but this, me being nice and kind is being abused.
So let's talk about karma. As good as I believe I am, I do not wish bad karma to happen to people who abuse my kindness. That's how kind I am ha ha.
Recently, I am quite surprised and amazed with the rumors flying around. I am not used to being the center of gossip. Golly, why me?
I try to be as low-key as possible.
To avoid these nasty gossips, ASK ME. I will tell you the real deal.
He he he, I am rambling but I hope I got to touch the issues plaguing me and got it off my chest.
Hmmmm, last song syndrome from a K-Pop song "I don't care...e e e e" or something like that.
I DON'T CARE ha ha ha... I really find it funny, these speculations. Speculate all you want, those are just speculations ha ha ha.
Oooooooh, it's 17 (or 16) days before Christmas....
I go out of the house to go to school at 5AM. The air is cold. The sky is still twinkling with stars. Sarap matulog!!!!!
Friday, November 05, 2010
2010 - Mixed Blessings, Still Blessed
In a few weeks time, it's another year. I am not thinking of Christmas anymore, I didn't bother to think my past birthday. As early as now, November 5, I will review my 2010...
Lovelife? I will write about this at the end...
My finances has been settled last June, I am so very very proud of that. Eight credit cards, amounting to more or less to PhP200,000.00. Most (almost all) of it is a result of investing in a business that didn't boom. Ha ha, if not for that, maybe I would have had a car by now.
I am hoping to start 2011 with a clean slate... happier, more alive... healthier...
Family Life
Ondoy was never kind in 2009. Even if it's a year ago, it left its horrible scars not physically but emotionally.
My parents were traumatized with the flood that Ondoy brought and has been renting houses since 2009 (well, Ondoy is just one of the reasons why they left our family house) and with my sister's help and generosity, my parents are now settled in Antipolo.
Lovelife? I will write about this at the end...
My finances has been settled last June, I am so very very proud of that. Eight credit cards, amounting to more or less to PhP200,000.00. Most (almost all) of it is a result of investing in a business that didn't boom. Ha ha, if not for that, maybe I would have had a car by now.
I am hoping to start 2011 with a clean slate... happier, more alive... healthier...
Family Life
Ondoy was never kind in 2009. Even if it's a year ago, it left its horrible scars not physically but emotionally.
My parents were traumatized with the flood that Ondoy brought and has been renting houses since 2009 (well, Ondoy is just one of the reasons why they left our family house) and with my sister's help and generosity, my parents are now settled in Antipolo.
Thursday, November 04, 2010
Doc
I was very sleepy last night, I wasn't listening, but now that I am awake, yes Doc, I promise to take care of my health. I am so touched that you want me to be healthy, and hopefully, in a few months I will change the title of my blog when I lose weight.
Love you Doc...
Love you Doc...
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
Breakfast with you...
Doc, thank you for mending my broken heart...
After numerous relationships (I would have liked to say failed relationships but on second thought decided to forego the word failed), I am starting one anew.
We reconnected through FB. Thanks Facebook. He searched for me and he found me.
Had a great time just talking and talking and falling asleep in his arms...
And since I don't cook, we had breakfast at the all-time Filipino fast food chain - Jollibee ha ha ha!
And I love the way you take care of me...
I love the way you look at me...
I am loving you...
And if, you decide to go ahead and marry and have a family on your own,
I will always be a friend, remember that.
Missing you already...
After numerous relationships (I would have liked to say failed relationships but on second thought decided to forego the word failed), I am starting one anew.
We reconnected through FB. Thanks Facebook. He searched for me and he found me.
Had a great time just talking and talking and falling asleep in his arms...
And since I don't cook, we had breakfast at the all-time Filipino fast food chain - Jollibee ha ha ha!
And I love the way you take care of me...
I love the way you look at me...
I am loving you...
And if, you decide to go ahead and marry and have a family on your own,
I will always be a friend, remember that.
Missing you already...
Finding Mr. Right - An Introduction
Finding Mr. Right
as published in Image Magazine - February 2004
Updated, March 8, 2008
Is it right to find Mr. Right? But actually, the real question is, is there a Mr. Right, not just for me but for everyone? If there is, then, it is not pointless to look and find him. And since my original question is, is it right to find Mr. Right, I am assuming that there exist a Mr. Right for me. Or should I make one perhaps? Or be one? Since I was aware that I am different from everyone else, that happiness is not only self-derived, I have been longing for someone to be my special someone.
Maybe it was culture or social conditioning, but the point is – we look for other people for validation and confirmation. I wouldn’t want to be a hypocrite and say that I don’t look for other people for love. Yes, it is the greatest love of all, learning to love one’s self but deep in my heart, it is greater to love and be loved by someone else. Since I came to this conclusion, I realized that longing for that somebody else hurts. It hurts to feel the emptiness of your heart that no matter what you do, you could not just fill it up. It pains to realize that after all the search, after one relationship after another; there is still the void of emptiness. Each relationship brings new insights and the realization that I haven’t met the one; the someone that would make my life different. The one, Mr. Right.
How could I find the Mr. Right of my life? I have tried going out for dates, meeting new people. I have been used, abused, manipulated and terribly hurt, only because I thought that if I only give-in, I will have Mr. Right. Talk about being desperate! But still I haven’t met him. Some may argue that to meet Mr. Right, one has to be one. One has to be the right person too. And I believe I am. I am caring, passionate, romantic and giving. I am sincere, thoughtful and sensitive. I appreciate life, I love fun. I am a good conversationalist, understanding, and smart. I am simple, and yet complicated. I am not a high-maintenance person. I admit, I am not perfect, but who is? I am not looking for Mr. Perfect; I am looking for Mr. Right.
Mr. Right for me is someone who, unabashedly, will sing me a song or recite to me a poem he had written. He isn’t necessarily good looking but pleasantly clean and neat. He is confident, and supportive, understanding and romantic. He is adventurous, encouraging me to try new things and discover new activities. Sometimes, he is quiet, preferring a night on the bed, talking. Or holding hands at the movies. He would enjoy going to the beach once in a while and with me, wait for the sun to set, the moon and stars to come out, sleep on the sand with the waves of the sea lulling us to sleep only to be awakened by the sunrise. Or an evening where he will cook pasta and set the table with candles and have dessert while listening to my favorite song “Your Song” or watching “Sleepless in Seattle or Serendipity.” We could have the same taste in music, food, books; or not. He can be very complicated, and I would cherish every moment in my life I’m sharing with him understanding his complexity. He could be simple and I would enjoy every moment of simple life, as long as it’s with him. I’ll share with him every thought, dreams and aspirations I have. He could be of my age, or older or younger. He could be all of the above… or not, again, I’m not looking for Mr. Perfect, just the one, someone who would feel right to me.
The task of finding Mr. Right may be fruitless, but at least no one can accuse me of not having tried at all. I may be getting older, but definitely, I am getting wiser. If five years from now, Mr. Right haven’t come along yet, I wouldn’t give up but I will go on with my life. The important thing is, aside from Mr. Right who hasn’t come yet, there’s another one who loves me as I am. Me.
Five years had passed. Did I meet my Mr. Right? In a way no, I met Mr. Right Now. But like every love story, or any story for that matter, mine had a beginning and an ending… And it just ended when my Mr. Right found his bride and I became his best man.
Ironic isn’t it?
To love someone for five years and have that chapter in my life end. Funny thing is, I am proud to say that at least, when our story ended, our life as friends began.
He is all of the above as I described and more. But this is not an open letter for him, but a letter for my potential lifemate.
Lifemate.
If there’s one thing I have learned in this quest of mine, is that love happens when you least expect it. But once again, I am putting myself out there, trying to catch the attention of Mr. Right, because maybe, just maybe, he needs a little nudge. Now that I have made my move, the next step is entirely up to him. He can either e-mail me or call me. I am patient, I can wait… because I know, spending the rest of my life with Mr. Right is worth waiting.
as published in Image Magazine - February 2004
Updated, March 8, 2008
Is it right to find Mr. Right? But actually, the real question is, is there a Mr. Right, not just for me but for everyone? If there is, then, it is not pointless to look and find him. And since my original question is, is it right to find Mr. Right, I am assuming that there exist a Mr. Right for me. Or should I make one perhaps? Or be one? Since I was aware that I am different from everyone else, that happiness is not only self-derived, I have been longing for someone to be my special someone.
Maybe it was culture or social conditioning, but the point is – we look for other people for validation and confirmation. I wouldn’t want to be a hypocrite and say that I don’t look for other people for love. Yes, it is the greatest love of all, learning to love one’s self but deep in my heart, it is greater to love and be loved by someone else. Since I came to this conclusion, I realized that longing for that somebody else hurts. It hurts to feel the emptiness of your heart that no matter what you do, you could not just fill it up. It pains to realize that after all the search, after one relationship after another; there is still the void of emptiness. Each relationship brings new insights and the realization that I haven’t met the one; the someone that would make my life different. The one, Mr. Right.
How could I find the Mr. Right of my life? I have tried going out for dates, meeting new people. I have been used, abused, manipulated and terribly hurt, only because I thought that if I only give-in, I will have Mr. Right. Talk about being desperate! But still I haven’t met him. Some may argue that to meet Mr. Right, one has to be one. One has to be the right person too. And I believe I am. I am caring, passionate, romantic and giving. I am sincere, thoughtful and sensitive. I appreciate life, I love fun. I am a good conversationalist, understanding, and smart. I am simple, and yet complicated. I am not a high-maintenance person. I admit, I am not perfect, but who is? I am not looking for Mr. Perfect; I am looking for Mr. Right.
Mr. Right for me is someone who, unabashedly, will sing me a song or recite to me a poem he had written. He isn’t necessarily good looking but pleasantly clean and neat. He is confident, and supportive, understanding and romantic. He is adventurous, encouraging me to try new things and discover new activities. Sometimes, he is quiet, preferring a night on the bed, talking. Or holding hands at the movies. He would enjoy going to the beach once in a while and with me, wait for the sun to set, the moon and stars to come out, sleep on the sand with the waves of the sea lulling us to sleep only to be awakened by the sunrise. Or an evening where he will cook pasta and set the table with candles and have dessert while listening to my favorite song “Your Song” or watching “Sleepless in Seattle or Serendipity.” We could have the same taste in music, food, books; or not. He can be very complicated, and I would cherish every moment in my life I’m sharing with him understanding his complexity. He could be simple and I would enjoy every moment of simple life, as long as it’s with him. I’ll share with him every thought, dreams and aspirations I have. He could be of my age, or older or younger. He could be all of the above… or not, again, I’m not looking for Mr. Perfect, just the one, someone who would feel right to me.
The task of finding Mr. Right may be fruitless, but at least no one can accuse me of not having tried at all. I may be getting older, but definitely, I am getting wiser. If five years from now, Mr. Right haven’t come along yet, I wouldn’t give up but I will go on with my life. The important thing is, aside from Mr. Right who hasn’t come yet, there’s another one who loves me as I am. Me.
Five years had passed. Did I meet my Mr. Right? In a way no, I met Mr. Right Now. But like every love story, or any story for that matter, mine had a beginning and an ending… And it just ended when my Mr. Right found his bride and I became his best man.
Ironic isn’t it?
To love someone for five years and have that chapter in my life end. Funny thing is, I am proud to say that at least, when our story ended, our life as friends began.
He is all of the above as I described and more. But this is not an open letter for him, but a letter for my potential lifemate.
Lifemate.
If there’s one thing I have learned in this quest of mine, is that love happens when you least expect it. But once again, I am putting myself out there, trying to catch the attention of Mr. Right, because maybe, just maybe, he needs a little nudge. Now that I have made my move, the next step is entirely up to him. He can either e-mail me or call me. I am patient, I can wait… because I know, spending the rest of my life with Mr. Right is worth waiting.
Why look for Mr. Right?
I have written the first post here in 2000, but it was published in 2004, I updated it in 2008 and now it's 2010 and I'm still looking for him.
Not Really Looking
I specifically got this laptop to motivate myself to start writing. It has been what, two months hence and I have not written anything substantial since then.
Moreover, it has been a week ago since I celebrated my birthday. I can’t really say it isthe best but it is certainly among the best birthday celebrations I had in my 34 years. This is the first time I got four cakes (almost five but the last one was changed to ice cream instead!)!
I only started having cakes when I started working. I grew up in a lower-middle class family, where these luxuries (cakes, ice creams and such) were not favored so much but instead homemade rice cakes (biko) and noodles (pancit). We were not being patriotic but were actually being frugal and practical.
Now I understand why (more often than I should) I indulge with a pint of ice cream and eating chocolate cakes is really a treat for me.
Going back to my blog title… why find Mr. Right?
I have received lots (well, tons to be honest) of love advice regarding this matter. And reviewing my first entry – the introduction – I cringe! I am so hopelessly romantic but I never realize I was that sappy.
Have I given up my search? Did I really look for Mr. Right?
The more you look, the more he eludes me.
So I stopped looking.
After my last relationship with Mr. Feeling-Straight-but-isn’t (who is also Mr. Feeling-Gwapo aka Mr, User-Friendly), I decided to just take stock of my current social status and concentrate on my own.
And Mr. Right has finally found me.
Moreover, it has been a week ago since I celebrated my birthday. I can’t really say it isthe best but it is certainly among the best birthday celebrations I had in my 34 years. This is the first time I got four cakes (almost five but the last one was changed to ice cream instead!)!
I only started having cakes when I started working. I grew up in a lower-middle class family, where these luxuries (cakes, ice creams and such) were not favored so much but instead homemade rice cakes (biko) and noodles (pancit). We were not being patriotic but were actually being frugal and practical.
Now I understand why (more often than I should) I indulge with a pint of ice cream and eating chocolate cakes is really a treat for me.
Going back to my blog title… why find Mr. Right?
I have received lots (well, tons to be honest) of love advice regarding this matter. And reviewing my first entry – the introduction – I cringe! I am so hopelessly romantic but I never realize I was that sappy.
Have I given up my search? Did I really look for Mr. Right?
The more you look, the more he eludes me.
So I stopped looking.
After my last relationship with Mr. Feeling-Straight-but-isn’t (who is also Mr. Feeling-Gwapo aka Mr, User-Friendly), I decided to just take stock of my current social status and concentrate on my own.
And Mr. Right has finally found me.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Sadness
This morning, I was feeling quite sad. I remember when I was trapped during the flood during Ondoy last year. It was only know that it is really hitting me that I with my family could have died then.
I am sad because my passion for material things is gone. Money, aside from the fact that I need it for my basic needs, doesn't really hold me. And despite the rebuilding I and my family is undergoing, I really feel I have not recovered yet.
I am sad because my passion for material things is gone. Money, aside from the fact that I need it for my basic needs, doesn't really hold me. And despite the rebuilding I and my family is undergoing, I really feel I have not recovered yet.
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